Hello my friends of the interwebs,
So there I was, doing a little research for our next MiniCast, looking up movie info and such. Then, all of a sudden, I saw it. I went through your classic signs of loss and mourning, sadness, anger, denial, then anger again, that slowly, yet steadily built to a fiery rage. As I stared at my screen I
asked myself, "how can this be?", "who is responsible for this?" and of course a simple, "why...why" as a single tear fell down my cheek.
What, you ask, could be the cause of such masculine and primal emotions? By all means see for yourselves. I give you the films releasing in the year 2013:
• G.I. Joe: Retaliation
• Scary Movie 5
• Iron Man 3
• Star Trek Into Darkness
• Fast & The Furious 6
• The Hangover Part III
• Monsters University
• Kick-Ass 2
• Despicable Me 2
• Grown Ups 2
• The Wolverine
• The Smurfs 2
• Red 2
• 300: Rise of an Empire
• Percy Jackson: Sea Monsters
• Insidious Chapter 2
• Machete Kills
• Thor: The Dark World
• Sin City: A Dame to Kill For
• Paranormal Activity V
• The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
• The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug
• Anchorman 2
• The Lone Ranger
• Man of Steel
• The Great Gatsby
• Great Expectations
• Evil Dead
Can you see the pattern? Literally every movie releasing this year is either a sequel, or a remake. Now I agree, there are a handful on this list that even I am excited about. I am not trying to imply that remakes or even sequels are, generally speaking, evil. However, to have so many in a calendar
year is simply unacceptable.
If we think about it, who is really to blame? The studios, the apparently absent and unoriginal writers, Andreas Music? Surprisingly enough, none of the above. After mulling this around in my mind grapes for a while I realized, it was me. I was to blame. I am the one who year in and year out not only stands for more sequels and remakes, but pays to see them, and my dear friends, I am
ashamed. So I stand before you now, and proudly say,
"Hello, my name is Franc, and I am a sequelholic!"
Join me wont you? Don't just sit there quietly while the studios cash their checks, laughing all the way, because they just made bank feeding you yet another Scary Movie when we all know those haven't been remotely entertaining since the first. I mean, how did we get 5 of these?
Again, I don't want to preach against sequels or remakes as a whole. I mean, if we had given up on Rocky after the producers crapped Mr. T out into our cereal, we would never have gotten to see Rocky IV. Without sequels, The Dark Knight trilogy never happens, and I die sad and enraged that a
truly epic Batman franchise never saw the light of day. Without remakes, we are all robbed of such gems as Let Me In, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, Dredd, and Star Trek.
All I ask, is let's not just lemming our way into the theater because some studio flashes a familiar face we once loved on the screen. Yes, I loved Gladiator and it made gajillions of dollars when it came out. But should we soil it's memory with some retelling or forced remake? The answer is no.
So this summer, go see the ones you truly want to see, because you can't live without it. Leave the rest be. Let's show these studios that we wont follow blindly, but instead force them to entertain us with new stories, new characters and new ideas. Let's bring originality back to the silver screen, cause from where I'm sitting, it's not looking so silver anymore, it's looking a solid French-Canadian bronze at best.